And now, for something completely different...
(One line a day, every day, until President Trump is re-elected).
"Good evening, and welcome to NightLine... I'm not Ted Koppel: We begin tonight with the bombshell report in the New York Post today that Hunter Biden is corrupt, and as sharp in his intellectual prime as his father Joe in his late seventies, and look up the highly detailed story yourself, unless you plan to do so via Facebook or Twitter, both have censored it, and for perspective ask yourself what Facebook, Twitter, and Mad Magazine have in common: one is satire, two are farce."
(Please continue to tune in, every night at 11:30... ish).