(Dear Friends: If you haven't seen footage of Madonna and/or Ms. Judd's March on D.C. speeches, you-tube it; further, this post would've appeared in a more timely fashion, but for minor technological difficulties; basically, I'm a technological dummy.)
Ladies and gentlemen! Welcome one and all to the magnificent Trump D.C. Hotel, Resort and Casino, Inc., where for one night and one night only (and maybe tomorrow night, depending on ratings), a spectacular battle of the sexes for the middle ages! (And mostly, for the middle-age-ed.)
And now, in the rrrrrrred corner, weighing in as the #1 top dog, and with a huge reach advantage, and a killer tan, we have the one, the only, President Donald J. Trump!, and in the boo-hoo blue corner, we have Madonna!, and in the off her rocker corner, we have... Ashley Judd? Look, Ms. Former America's Sweetheart: Were you kidding us? What the bleep was that1? At its core, probably an audition for a remake of "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest"2, with The Donald as Nurse Ratched, Ashley Judd as McMurphy, and as The Chief, Ashley Judd, and as the character played by Danny DeVito (Martini), Ashley Judd, and as the character played by Christopher Lloyd (Taber, probably McMurphy's bull-goose looney understudy, before he became Doc Brown), Ashley Judd, and as stuttering Billy Bibbit (a virtuoso performance of a lifetime, except Brad Dourif went full stutter; you never go full stutter3), Ashley Judd, and who knew anybody could make Madonna look so much less-looney? (Other than Sean Penn.)
Yes, that would be Ashley Judd. (Despite the fact that Madonna fantasizes about blowing up the White House, which is so coo-coo for Cocoa Puffs, it's to be ignored by all, except the Secret Service.)
No matter, ladies and gents, because, and I'll roll it as best I can...
Let's... Get... Ready... To... (cue the Buffer)...
Rrrrrrrrruuuuuuum-ble!
(JFW -- you and I probably agree that both Madonna and Ashley McMurphy are either looking to resurrect over-the-hill singing careers, flailing movie careers, or sleep with George Soros. Of course, George isn't having any of that kung pao! He thinks he's George Clooney.)
And there's that word looney again. By the way, did any of you see "Money Monster"? Spoiler alert: Don't bother.
1Apparently, Ms. Judd was only reciting a high-school student's poem. Note to the poet: work on the metaphors. Comparing Trump to Hitler is so cliche.
2If you haven't seen it, see it. A great novel made into an arguably better movie, an arguably rare occurrence.
3Jr., Downey, Robert: as Kirk Lazarus in "Tropic Thunder." (DreamWorks; 2008)